Cyber Courage.

I am not one of those pessimistic people that looks at the world and thinks of how our generation is failing. Adults may say that we are, but odds are the adults of that generation said the same exact thing and yet somehow America has progressed. I am amazed by our generation. By the oppurtunities we have been given and i can't wait to see how we will take advantage of the resources provided. There are endless possibilites to what we can do. But in some ways i think we have fallen ridiculously off base. The interent, is purely brilliant. I can't imagine how one could even IMAGINE such a thing before it was in exsitence and now i believe that many people can't imagine a world without. It has provided such a tool to access information in a quick an effective manner. It has made a way for people to express their opinions and capture their individuality. It has provided an easier way for business to be held with countries overseas. And through Facebook people have been able to reconnect and rebuild relationships that otherwise might be lost without the convinient communications. And i will not be so bold as to claim i do not enjoy Facebook for it's social purposes. It's sad really, i am fairly addicted. But i do believe that sites like Facebook and Twitter, and let's not forget that good ole MySpace, create unrealistic lifestyles and expectations. Studies show that many girls get off Facebook feeling more depressed then they did when they signed on. We pose for pictures with our girlfriends, and take at least thirty, mainly so we can be sure to delete all the ones we feel are unflattering. So in most cases girls end up with.. Two. And then after we have posted our own pictures and an edited one to put as a new profile picture, we get tagged in all of the exact same pictures that were taken by five different cameras, and go through a untag all of the ones we don't like. Or comment on them and put OURSELVES down just to beat others to the punch. So it looks like you already know you 'look gross', so no one has to say anything. And then we sit there for HOURS going through other girls pictures and suddenly forget what a process that was, and believe that all of these girls are naturally that pretty and take great pictures and are so happy and so skinny when in reality, 90% of girls just went through that exact same gruelling process. And i am certainly a guilty party. Actually, i choose NOT to put up pictures, because i am too lazy to go through the process. We spend so much time trying to make the world believe we have this happy, perfect, blemish free life, but then fool ourselve into believing that others actually DO, and if we were more like them our lives would be beautiful too. And the sad part is, this isn't even the worst part of the internet. Somehow we brainwash ourselves into believing that the computer, is not a real world, and whatever is said and done on Twitter or Facebook is no big deal. We get cyber courage. And we say things that we would never have the guts to say to someone's face. Because those people "aren't really there"... We become these passive agressive, judgemental beings, absolutely hell-bent on making someone else miserable because now we are depressed from being on their page. So we get on Facebook with friends and spend HOURS on the NewsFeed just waiting for someone to post something we can make fun of or talk about. Girls LIVE for pictures of the underage pregnancies, and the ridiculous marriages albums, and the latest relationship status. And Twitter is overflowing with nicknames girls fashion for other girls so that their group of friends can hashtag the nickname and talk about the girl in front of them without them being able to say anything. And before we know it we get addicted to this feeling of power. You say one thing about a profile that makes a friend laugh, and you feel obligated to come up with something else, to continue holding attention. Or create one nickname that people find clever, and you feel like a leader, no matter what it is you are leading. Oblivious to the fact that while you are soaking up the glory, there is someone somewhere embarassed and angry. I had a nickname once. I wasn't popular enough to get on Twitter, but i was a HIT on Facebook. Muffin. A group of girls came up with that name due to my real cute muffin top i rocked in my heavier life. Clever huh..? And statuses were full of comments on this "Muffin" and all the things she did and how fat she was and what a whore she was. Meanwhile, i am watching but can't say a word. Because i wasn't suppose to know it was me. And if i said anything they would just attack me with how 'consceded' i was and remind me that not everything is about me. It's a very trapping feeling really. You feel obligated to stand up for yourself, but then feel that will only lead to more bullying. Provide more amo. It would be easier just to stay quiet, and hope someone else does something worthy of talking about. How sad. Being a teenager is hard enough without the confusion of yet another way to be put down. Facebook was a brilliant invention, and Twitter is fabulous, but the cyber bullying has become outrageous. Studies show that it is now the third leading cause of teen suicide. Topped only by drugs and family turmoil. This week, combat this. Post something encouraging on someone's wall, and then, LOG OFF. Read a book. Spend some time with your family. Go on a jog. Live a life, outside of the cyber world. You might find you missed playing ball with your dad. Or pealing peas with your mom. Or listening to your sister complain about her homework. Or wrestling with little brothers. Because that's living. You can have 5,000 friends on Facebook, but at the end of the day, only 30 of those would come to your funeral. Now don't get me wrong, i will continue to use my Facebook. But use it as something constructive, and brief. Close the computer, and open your eyes. There's probably a whole lot your missing.